Nov
12
2009

Download "Born to Breed"

We just learned that the “Born to Breed” episode of Secret Lives of Women is available through the iTunes store. If you have iTunes on your computer, click on “iTunes Store” in the sidebar and use the search to find “Born to Breed.” The entire show can be downloaded for only $1.99.

It’s a great show, really. Don’t let the title scare you away. The only reservation we have is the marketing guy (the producer is convinced it was not a woman) who put together the intro–shows women with body tatoos and leather outfits. Sick. But, get past that and watch the show; it is a nice and thought provoking episode.

And don’t be so quick to judge the adversaries on the show. They have very personal takes on the Quiverfull movement. Though they are vocally against families like ours, their perspectives are interesting. We think especially of Vyckie and her oldest daughter, Angel. They have a heartbreaking testimony of religious abuse and judgment. Sad, Vyckie admits she brought this on herself, though she ultimately lays blame on her x-husband. They’d probably be surprised to know that Wendy and I found ourselves really hurting for them, and in some ways relating.

See, there is much to be said about religious legalism in this Quiverfull movement. Many of us (Vyckie included) at some point thought works could somehow replace the personal calling God has in store for our families. We take fine-tooth combs to Scripture and come up with all sorts of foolish dogma on how to live perfect Christian lives, and I suppose letting God bless you with children can be one of them. It wasn’t till after our fallout with Alicia, our oldest, that we began to see the error of our way. We go into depth with this in our book Love in the House where we returned love to its rightful place in our family.

Of course, we still hold fast to the promises of Scripture and the calling God has for the Jeubs. But we take the Word of God at its word: Love is the most excellent way. Place anything above love and your life will morph into an ugly, legalistic beast. This is the picture Vyckie and her new friend, Kathryn Joyce, try to paint of families like ours. Thank God they’re wrong.

Believe it or not, I ordered Kathryn Joyce’s Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement. She’s a good writer, though she comes from a secular feminist perspective of the world. She admits in the introduction to this. I would argue that she fears the implications of conservative, Christian parents with several children. Her arguments attempt to put families like ours into a carefully defined, narrow box. After this, she will systematically tear the box apart with her feminist perspectives.

Heh, only past the intro and I can see where it is going. Kathryn, if you’re reading this, return the favor and buy our book.

About Chris & Wendy Jeub

The Jeub Family live in Monument, Colorado. They encourage couples to love God and love one another, building an atmosphere of love in their homes.

  • mollie

    I love your passion for this issue Chris and Wendy. I love how willing you two are to be “out there” not hide yourselves like so many large families appear to do. You are being light in a dark world and even more you are shedding light to an issue that is very much overlooked even in the christian community! You have planted many seeds in my life and my husbands as to the possibilites, blessings and truths to giving this area to God. I am still very much in love with your book and go back to it often to refresh myself and encourage myself when needed. One thing that has been an encouragment is that you said when you had 3,4 and 5 children you were very tempted to be done because they were all little and it was a lot of work all at once. I am living this reality right now I have an 8,5,2 and 6 month old and it is so overwhelming,but I remember your words when there comes times where I think “How could I handle more!??” Your words give me hope to keep going, that I CAN do it! I am thankful for your family this holiday season and appreciate how God has worked through you to impact others. THANK YOU JEUBS AND THANK YOU JESUS!!!

  • Andrea

    Jeubs, I watched the show (one my rare times watching tv) and though I respected you and loved what you had to say listening to vykie then reading her blog nearly tore me apart and left me feeling sick, I wish I never read what she had wrote. I am engaged and 20 years old. I live in fort collins so we have a Colorado conection. My future hubby and I are planning to live a quiverfull life as well and homeschool is the Lord blesses us with any children. I really love reading about your family and I will be buying your book once I get the money to.

  • http://simplelivingak.wordpress.com/ Jason and Anna

    THanks for the tip, in 5 hours when itunes is done downloading we will be able to watch it!!! :) Thanks
    ~BLessings~

  • http://www.joyfulmother.blogspot.com Chris

    I think that having children is a great blessing. There is truth to this. But I do feel there can be error in the following of a doctrine out of the flesh and not by the spirit of god.

    I guess I am rather not the norm of a quiver full believer and I do have 8 children. Each child has been put in my heart by the Lord. I believe in being Spirit led in all our choices we make in life. I believe in hearing his voice and know that He has a plan (a specific plan) for all our lives individually. I find it sad that there are families out there who will stick to a doctrine of any sort and follow it rather then the Lord’s word for their specific family. This is where the destruction of families starts to take toll. You will find many mothers who feel they are doing things that maybe God never told them to follow. This is bondage.

    Don’t think I’m against large families….No, I love them and I always encourage a family who is considering more children to go for it and not cut their seed because of what society or the world is saying. Go with what God wants for your family. With full force!! But if they have no desire to have more, then why are they still having more? And then why is the Quiver full community judging their hearts. Especially if they are seeking the Lord and not really wanting kids. How do they know their heart. We are not hanging in their living room when they are with the Lord. Judging families who are not having many children is wrong. Or if we have lots we should never think “we are better” or that we are doing God’s ultimate will. This is where I have my own issues….the judgement in this community. I know it because I have heard the comments made in “love” “They are not wanting to surrender their selfish hearts to the Lord in this area” What?

    How do they know what God has been telling them. This is not right to judge this way.

    I LOVE large families and I believe they are such a huge blessing in this society. You being one of them!! :) There is joy in your hearts and love. You are an example of doing the Will of God for the Jeub family. This is awesome. God has put this desire in your heart and this is wonderful!! The Lord is so very personal and this is such a wonderful thing to experience. We are not all clones and not all wanting to look like the Jeub family or even the Duggars. If God is calling us to have 30 children or just 6 then this can be life not death. We need to find who God created each one to be and find this “identity” He has for us. Then soar like eagles!!!

    I am willing to get stones for my personal belief. I am free in Christ!!!

    WIth love

  • Camilla

    I actually meant to comment on the opening sequence. When I was watching it I was totally alone but I still said out loud “Seriously, bondage as the opening?” I didn’t know if they used the same opening sequence for every episode or not.

  • sandra

    I do pray for Vyckie and her family.Sometimes ppl can’t see that they’re being so liberal,they’re selling their own selves short.This is exactly what Satan wants! It’s trickery at it’s finest!
    I imagine Monica Lewinsky felt pretty empowered at one point.I can’t imagine she feels that way now.(just for example).
    Other than that,I don’t know what to say.I found myself a single mom at one point,too.But if anything,I was even MORE conservative with my family! Not that I’m not now,but I was certainly ‘on-guard’ with the rest of the world and wasn’t about to let anything evil inflict myself or my children.In that respect,while i do have much sympathy for Vyckie,I also have to say,”I don’t understand”.

  • http://www.ourfruitfulharvest.blogspot.com Fruitful Harvest

    I agree with Camillas comment!

    I went to Viycki’s blog (No Longer Quivering.)and was shocked at her disrespect of other QF ers she seemed to name call and put others down. Thats not Christian at all but if I read correctly she is no longer a Christian…..her Uncle told her being Christian is just “mind control”
    Oh well enough about her~

    I have never read any of the Quiverfull books that are out there….I never even knew that giving your fertility to the Lord had a name!(quiverfull)
    I’m a Roman Catholic and have always been taught that we don’t use birth control…its wrong!
    Many use NFP but I never knew about NFP that is taught by the church…no one ever talks about it and offers to teach young newlyweds about it! Many Catholics are like the rest of America and use birth control! Only 1% of Catholics use NFP and of those only 1/4 have become QF…using nothing!
    Most of us breastfeed each child for about 2 1/2yrs on the average and our children are “NATURALY” spaced 2-3yrs apart. We do not TRY to get pregnant or wean a baby earlier than we would already just to regain our fetility…we leave the whole matter in God’s hands!

    We are Quiverfull and lead by God~

    Being QF does not mean the Lord has asked us not to dance,wear pants,go to regular churches, or put our children in puplic school~

    Or to do the opposite…nither makes us MORE holy or worthy. We are all saved by God’s grace and Jesus’s dieing on the cross…the end!

    God wants us to seek HIS face…talking to HIM daily,read HIS word and hearing HIS voice for what he wants your like to look like~

    I want to warn folks…that small home churches can lead you down the wrong path….a slow progression to a cult! They “base” the ways its members must live to belong to the group. It one mans inturpritation of THE WORD!

    Jeub family you were awesome~
    Sorry my comment was so long~
    I have enjoyed reading all the other comments~

    Warmly,
    Georgiann momma of 6 so far~

  • Amanda

    Am watching it now for free on youtube… fyi :)
    Amanda

  • Jennifer H

    I LOVED seeing you guys on Born to Breed! You make large families look “normal” and I really find that encouraging and uplifting.

  • Michelle

    Thank you for posting this. I watched the movie and felt afraid, saddened and confused because of Vykkie’s story. I was most definitely shaken. Then I realized something. She wasn’t following God’s way, she was following her own system of legalism and she is putting this lifestyle in a Box where it shouldn’t be.
    She thought that doing these things would somehow make her righteous and happy. I read some of her blog and it tore me apart which further caused me to pray and think of what indeed did happened.
    I do see some in the quiverfull “movement” as she calls it become legalistic in their thinking. ei, you are not having any faith in God if you use any form of birth control even if the wife’s life is at stake, you must wear prairie style or cape style dresses to not cause a brother to stumble. You must submit to an over powering abusive husband. She missed the whole point. As a matter of fact she missed ALL of it. This legalism is what led this family to bondage.
    She mentions Vision Forum, it is NOT dictatorship as she describes. It trains husbands in their calling to LOVE their wives, protect their family etc. I have received the wonderful benefit from their teachings. My husband has received the wonderful benefit of Nancy Campbell of me being his helpmeet. I have NEVER felt under my husbands thumb. I willingly submit because quite frankly he makes it easy by his love for me. And I LOVE having someone to look up to. I feel COMPLETELY equal to him. I AM equal God says so. We are DIFFERENT but God thinks both genders are wonderful and unique in our God given roles.

    I wish this video didn’t have “Born to Breed” as the title or calling it a “quiverfull movement” per say. It should be called “How one woman fell into the path of legalism” and how other families have experienced the freedom in their husband being the leaders of their homes and how children truly are a blessing. I have sooo much to say about this it would take me all day. I did write a post on her website and of course it got alot of thumb down responses. :o)
    I am going to hold on to the truth that the Lord led my husband and I into this “lifestyle” as she calls it and love the encouragement I get from the teachings in this lifestyle. God has a plan for the Rogers family, different then the Jeubs, different than the Duggers or the Campbells albeit it is similar it is indeed different.

    Much love to you as your post above confirmed my findings and gave me a sense of peace.
    I am very saddened that she has a blog about this further confusing people that already have an idea or hatred for this lifestyle. :o(

    Michelle
    Wife of a WONDERFUL leader and mommy of 7 beautiful blessings!!