Dec
01
2011

Jeub Trolls and Haterz

Internet trolls

  • “Yeah there are some people in the world that don’t want to have tons of kids or any kids at all. Get over it.”
  • “Society cant wrap its head around some not wanting children. Some of us are childless by choice ,design or infertility but yet so called Christians preach fire and brimstone not knowing the circumstances or the person.”
  • “STOP breeding!!!”

These are comments from previous blog posts from Internet “trolls.” They visit whenever we get a bit of media attention. A Jeub Family Troll is not a friend of the Jeubs (obviously), but will visit our site, sometimes even disguising himself or herself as sympathetic to our message (family, love, children, Jesus), and post non-topical comments in an attempt to “troll” for skeptic readers.

Some are reading this post now. We’ve gotten to know a few, and they have similarities. Many are estranged from their families, know little of real loving relationships, hate children, or are cynical of Christianity. The anonymity of the Internet (they rarely post their real names or register with valid email addresses) prompts them to post vile comments.

Now, a troll is not necessarily someone with whom we disagree. We welcome disagreement! We are the last to claim we’ve got life all figured out. No, trolls are different. Trolls attempt to lead the conversation away from (not toward) the original thesis. They’re sometimes called Haterz, the term lending more toward pop celebrities. Haterz will watch a 46 minute TV show (like one of ours), cast judgment on the celebrity, then seek out their website to post their judgment. Anonymously, of course.

This is the reason some sites put limitations on comments, requiring moderation before going live. This website doesn’t do that. Sure, I remove profane posts or the snip that is WAY off topic, but I entertain the crass and suspiciously “troll-like” comments. I never delete comments just because I disagree with them. I’m intrigued with their doubts — and “doubts” are exactly what they are — in this wonderful life of family, love, children and Jesus. They may be reacting immaturely, criticizing rather than inquiring, but if you can see through the cynicism and crassness, they are really filled with question.

Mature “trolls” will engage in a conversation. Some trolls have ended in nice online conversation. I believe that those who give our ideas some ample consideration, even if they start hostile, they come around. They may not ascribe to 16 children! But they come around to know our family a bit more, and we get to know them. Sometimes they come full circle. Sometimes Wendy and I learn a few things from them.

I’ve got a few juicy posts lined up that dig deeper into these things. We live a life that is abnormal, true, so naturally people will judge us before really getting to know us. I want to spend some time delving into these judgments, share them with you, and learn together. Please let me know what you think. I’d love to hear from you, even from you trolls.

P.S. I kid you not. I got a Facebook message from a friend when I was typing this out. “My wife said some trolls were flaming you on your blog. Don’t let them get you down…You guys are an inspiration.” Heh. I believe that was a Jesus message. You will want to stay tuned these coming days. We’re going to learn and expose a lot.

About Chris Jeub

Chris is the father of 16 children, busily running the family businesses and learning the depths of love along the way.

  • Hal & Melanie Young

    My dear friends, we appreciate you so much!

    This issue is one that few people who aren’t in the public eye understand. When you obey the Lord when He asks you to take on a public ministry, it’s like a general exposing himself before the enemy to encourage the troops — you draw all the fire! It takes a real steadiness and trust in the Lord to handle the haterz. It’s hard — and it’s hard for our children. I wish supportive Christians understood better just how hard — just how badly leaders need their prayers.

    Melanie & Hal

    • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

      Melanie and Hal, you guys are awesome! Thanks for your friendship and support.

  • Mindyrice8

    It just goees to show you that you are doing something right. Otherwise the devil wouldn’t be so infuriated. You are a blessing to so many of us.

  • BJ

    May God continue to bless your family.  Stand strong in Him.  Your ministry is so encouraging to so many of us.  We get the hate, too.  It’s directed at us in the grocery store, in relative’s homes, and even at Church.  It’s so refreshing to read your blog and be reminded that we’re not the only crazy people in the world who love having children.

    One of my nieces told me years ago–“You are a strange little family”.  Now, many people tell us we’re a strange big family.  That’s okay.  Jesus wouldn’t be too happy with us if we were like the world.  And His opinion of me is what matters!

    Keep on encouraging others!  Keep on sharing the message that God has laid on your hearts!  And know that there are plenty of us, strangers to you now–but brothers and sisters through our Lord–who are praying for you and praising God for your ministry.

  • Turtle

    None of those examples you highlighted warranted the “Many are estranged from their families, know little of real loving relationships, hate children, or are cynical of Christianity.” Comment. So I guess because a woman suffers from infertility and does not have the luxury of having their own children in turn “hate children”? People who only have one or two children are “estranged from their families”?  These aren’t “Haterz”(It’s not the late 90’s/early 2000’s, using a Z is not cute) or trolls. You chose to publicly put your family in the spotlight, therefor people will criticize you. Why is it that so many of these larger fundamentalist home schooled families who have/had TV shows, books, gone to the media etc.,  live the motto “Do as I say, But don’t do as I do”? You later go on in this blog post to say people attack you before knowing you.  Yet isn’t that exactly what you’re doing? Accusing them of being un-godly, having bad family relationships, not knowing real love  and hating children because they offered their criticism of your PUBLIC blog ? That in itself shows you deserve all the “trolling” and “haterz” coming your way(I am talking about YOU, not your children or even your wife). The world is full of all different types of religions, family make ups and opinions. Get over it. Just because you have certain religious beliefs and a certain family make up, does not make you and your kind better then anyone else. God does not love arrogance OR ignorance, you seem to be displaying both. 

    • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

      Turtle, you’re going to really enjoy the posts coming up. Thanks for commenting!

    • Kidsmomofmany

      Ummm…how did you get infertility=hating children? How did you get only having two kids means the same? The commonality I notice among trolls is they INTENTIONALLY misinterpret what is said, not out of ignorance but out of wanting to pick a fight. No where did he say those things applied to ALL people, but maybe some.

  • Tawny B.

    Pretty excited! I wish we could have lots and lots of children (even though this isn’t the post topic I get it) but infertility does pose its issues for us. The thing is, I find NONE of what you say, as bashing on me because we only were able to have two children before secondary infertility was put in our path. It is like, my personal situation is nothing of what yours is, yet I find you never offending. I don’t understand how so many can.

    You are speaking of YOUR life, YOUR beliefs and what YOU and CHRIST have decided is right for YOUR family.

    How is that hurting me? It isn’t. How is that bashing me because of infertility? It isn’t. How is that making me feel horrid for not being able to conceive more than 2 children, even though we so desperately want to? It isn’t.

    THAT is the point.

    If you are feeling “bad” or “guilt” about what the Jeubs post, then it is more than likely an INTERNAL issues (which is what I get Chris was trying to say with the “many are estranged…..” comment) that is causing them to feel so negative towards posts and a family that is working so hard to always be positive.

    So I say this you, Jeub family, and all Haterz (hehehe , oh ebonics!), MY personal struggles do not dictate or define what YOU are highlighting in your own lives. I appreciate your view point, and more so this….BECAUSE my Husband and I can’t seem to conceive anymore, I am that much more thankful that you DO share your life, because it gives me a glimpse (albeit a small one) into what life would be like if I were blessed 16 times over :)

    Many blessings Jeub Family. Thank you Chris and Wendy, for what you do, and sharing yourselves. May the Lord bless you ever more abundantly for your Faithfulness and the way you raise those amazing children!

    • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

      I really like how you stated this, Tawny! Thank you so much, you’re very kind.

      The trolls hit us hard on this very issue a year ago. Here’s a link to the original: http://jeubfamily.com/2010/11/30/dont-mix-messages-on-infertility/

  • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

    I came across this quote from one of my favorite authors, John Eldredge, speaking toward those who answer God’s calling by moving forward with their passions:

    “…the going will get rough. The world, the minions of darkness, and your own double-mindedness are all set against you. Just try coming alive, try living from your heart for the Sacred Romance and watch how the world responds. They will hate you for it and will do everything in their power to get you to fall back into the comfort of the way things were. Your passion will disrupt them, because it sides with their own heart which they’ve tried so hard to put away. If they can’t convince you to live from the safer places they have chosen, they will try intimidation. If that fails, they’ll try to kill you–if not literally, then at the level of your soul.”

    • T. Gates

      Wow, he says it so perfectly.  People have been mocked, laughed at, and killed since the beginning of sin (not time) for following God and doing what He calls them to do.

  • Ann Washburn

    This was an excellent post!  I have only 2 children, it is fairly doubtful that at age 44 I will have more, yet I still admire/find inspiration from families such as yours, the Duggars, the Bates, etc.  Without highlighting any one family or particular situation, yes, I will admit that sometimes I will read/see something that makes me shake my head YET IT DOES NOT DETER from my admiration/inspiration.  There was one perfect human in the entire history of planet Earth, all of us are fallible, and charged by our Lord to love each other.  I always look forward to your posts!  Blessings, peace, grace, love,

  • Jennifer Franklin

    Not hating on you… but the people who are childless by choice, design or infertility. If people claim to “love children” they don’t go out and have 16 children… that just proves they love their OWN children. The Jeubs make pretty kids and train them right. I love my own children. If someone “loves children” but are “unable” are fooling themselves. Over 400,000 children are in foster care, many over age 8 are available for adoption. If your haters get mad over their situation, they COULD walk through 5 years of hell-fire to adopt a baby; wade the deep, sanctifying waters of foster care or adopting older kids; or even volunteer at the after school program or Teammates. These haters who search the web for someone to argue with know not love. They aren’t willing to give of their time for a large family…(or even helping those without) but are willing to spout dysfunction during commercial breaks of Glee to vent their pain.

    I have really enjoyed your blog since it started and have some of your books. I like to watch shows of larger families to get pointers on how to handle my 5 kids and how to organise my life. While you make it look easy, I know you have just had years of practice!

  • Sheri Hepworth

    I only have six children and I’ve been privileged to homeschool them all. (three are God-fearing adults) I’ve had all manner of hateful things said to me because of my personal Biblically-based reasons for having more than 1.2 children, homeschooling, home churching, home canning (!), no youth groups, etc. The list goes on and on; I’m sure you’re very familiar with this sort of distain thrown at you. I do not ‘get in people’s faces’. I do not blog nor do I have a television show highlighting my ‘weird’ life. It’s neighbours, strangers, and a few fringe friends who’ve offered up some snarky comments against me and my hubby for our heavily-prayed-over choices. Our decision to homeschool does not mean anyone else (our parents included) need feel judged or slighted if they chose/choose public or private education for their children. Since I choose not to have my children in youth groups, that does not mean friends need to scoff at me that I’m jing their involvement in homeschool support groups or youth meetings.
    You and your sweet wife have the opportunity to share your joyful family with the world through blogs, videos, TV, and books. It doesn’t mean you’re ‘out to get’ the folks who don’t ‘do’ things like you do. However, as another observant commenter here said already, if something said or written brings conviction, it’s a heart matter between the reader and the Lord. It’s not that you stand in condemnation of their choices; God may very well be, though!

    I enjoy your updates. I was telling my children just the other day how I admire you for spending so little on Christmas gifts for so many children. But, I think what shocks me more is that you can get three gifts for each child for such a small amount! Where on earth do you store it?

    God bless you this month. I pray you have an abundance of gifts given to you to help you through the next year.

    • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

      Thanks Sheri. On the Christmas gifts: We used to keep them at my office, but I moved that home earlier this year. Now we keep the items in our storage bin.

  • Gilora

    Chris, I believe that the first two comments you posted are disagreements with your point of view and not “troll” posts.   Calling people who post disagreements “estranged from their families, know little of loving relationships, hate children or are cynical of Christianity” does not seem very Christian.  Judge not …

    • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

      Whenever we break through the anonymity that trolls usually start with, we discover them to have deep problems of their own. Their snarky judgment of us, in fact, often stems from a deep-seeded pain that has little to do with us. This is just a consistent observation we have made, not a judgment of any one person or group of people.

  • Sheila

    Hi Chris,
                      I think that your family is truly inspirational. I am a huge fan of your family and also of the Duggars and the Bates families. God has given you all a love for children that some people in our society cannot understand and I feel so sorry for them.They do not understand because they have believed so many lies about overpopulation and freedom of choice. God delights in families such as yours and I pray that many more people would turn their hearts towards their children and, more importantly, towards Jesus.
                                                 God bless you and your family,
                                                                                 Sheila   (UK)
                                             

    • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

      All the way from the UK, cool! Thanks Sheila.

  • Jennifer Mull

    I think those who are trolls or haterz or even those who simply disagree with you should at least take note of the fact that you welcome their disagreements. Nothing close-minded or judgmental about that….I have also been impressed with the way you respond to such disagreeing people… you are not disrespectful to them and you don’t delete their posts… you also allow others to come into the conversation, rather than assume that it is yours alone to defend… really, the way you have handled disagreements on here should be a great evidence to others that you are NOT trying to tell anyone how to live, but only sharing how you live! I really enjoy learning from families who are larger than mine… I *only* have 8…. :-)

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  • laurel jade

     
     “Many are estranged from their families, know little of real loving relationships, hate children, or are cynical of Christianity…”
    “They cringe at large family living, ridicule the faith it often requires, and despise people like us. They often post on this site, more so on TV gossip sites, spreading vitriol that is aimed to hurt and destroy family living.”

    That not true. Trolls like to post offensive material just to get a reaction because they find it fun.  Trolls shouldn’t be a problem if you don’t feed them (i.e. react to their posts)

    • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

      There is some truth to what you are saying. Stay with me till the end on this one, though. I have a pretty significant conclusion to make, and it addresses the blogging principle of “ignore the trolls.”

  • Titania

    I don’t understand why some people are so busy getting into the lives of others as if they have no life of thier own. I mean, I love the fact that you guys believe this way, and you have been an inspiration to me. I think people should sweep their house instead of trying to sweep everone elses.

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