Dec
29
2011

Let Your Blogging Light Shine

I recently got into a good conversation with someone who is struggling with blogging. She’s older and having trouble with technical issues, but also with the idea of “offending” people. She has a wealth of wisdom to share, so I (and her friends) am encouraging her to start blogging.

But here’s her dilemma. Every time she tries writing something profound, she hesitates. She’s afraid of offending others. She thinks her ideas are judging people who disagree with her. She’s in a deadlock, and I hope she sees her way through it.

Many people wonder why I – with Wendy – press on with our messages on Family, Children, Love and Jesus knowing full-well we offend the childless-by-choice crowd. Seriously, if you read some of the comments from visitors, you can see the obvious: Our message ticks some people off. They do not want to be reminded that:

  • Family is arguably the most treasured thing anyone has in their life.
  • Children. They’re blessings. Always.
  • Love is the most important commandment.
  • Jesus loves everyone and has a wonderful life ahead for them, and that life could be with a lot of children.

So the trolls come, they vomit in the comment section of our blog posts, and they go back to their childless-by-choice websites that enjoy gossiping about TLC families. Okay, fine. For our family – and probably for yours, if you are just passing by for a visit – we return to Family, Children, Love and Jesus. And life couldn’t be more rewarding over here.

See, as a blogger, you’ll be sharing your perspectives, but this is NOT the same as picking a fight. When living in community, we should all be able to “take some, leave some.” Your blogging is your sharing – giving some of yourself to others – not your judgment on them.

That said, writing will bring criticism. Should the crabby trolls give me pause; should I hesitate before casting my opinion on my own blog? Only when that opinion is mean-spirited or incorrect, and I strive (like every blogger should) to consider the wisdom in my thoughts. Because really…

The only way to avoid criticism
is to avoid saying anything worth while at all.
[Tweet this]

Instead, respond kindly to your critics, sometimes leaving their opinions to themselves, and perhaps somewhere in the dialogue you learn from one another. This is healthy and encourages people to grow and learn in harmony. I learn along with my audience. The more I write, the more I learn, and the better writer (and thinker) I become.

But here’s dead end thinking: believing that your opinions are judgmental, and therefore not worth sharing. Or labeling your heartfelt insights as sin. “We shouldn’t judge, you know.”

Hogwash. This stinking thinking robs others from the gifts you have to share. “Hide it under a bushel — NO!” If you, like my friend, are struggling with this idea of being judgmental because you hold a point of view you think is worth sharing, I suggest you throw that idea out and let your little light shine. You have a lot to share and life is short.

––––––––

P.S. Here are a few links to some of our most criticized articles from the past few months. Click through and scroll down to the comments. Help me out a bit and reply to them!

About Chris Jeub

Chris is the father of 16 children, busily running the family businesses and learning the depths of love along the way.

  • Jennifer Mull

    I always say if a conviction isn’t worth sharing, it isn’t worth having…. the point of having a conviction is that you believe it is TRUE…. and if it is TRUE then it is TRUE… meaning it is true for all…. on some basic level… now, we might not all be personally convicted in the same way…. for instance, I’ve had many friends who had the same convictions about children, but chose to live that out in different ways. But, at the core, the conviction that children are a blessing was still there.

    Of course, sometimes when I share my OPINIONS, not convictions, I am sharing from a narrowed view– my own perspective– and need my view to be widened. Nothing wrong with others coming in and sharing a different perspective. We can share our convictions and our opinions in a respectful way. I am careful not to judge people, only God knows their hearts, but I will still judge actions and sin… we are called to judge that!

    The trouble is, many people don’t realize that when someone reminds them of a sin they are struggling with, their first reaction is offense because they are under conviction. Their own hearts are judging them! People under conviction will project that onto the person who is sharing and accuse them of judging…. 

    In the end, I think we have to realize that if we are going to share Christ with anyone, we are always going to offend SOMEone…

    • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

      I’ve used the term “healthy tension” before. We need elbow room to wrestle with heavy topics, and I hope JeubFamily.com wrestles with some biggies.

      • Jennifer Mull

        Yes… that is a good term…and I think you do a great job wrestling with the heavy topics…  I wish more people could get beyond feeling judged or offended, and would just wrestle a bit….

  • Christine

    Just a heads up that you have advertising that is promoting a psychic…I know that Google generates random advertising but I thought I’d let you know…

    I’m not so sure about how I feel about blogging…I loved being able to share what the Lord was  doing in our home and many shared that they were thankful for the encouragement but when I see trolls on other blogs or other bloggers such as Mckmama being torn apart it totally turns me off from wanting to blog. It actually creeps me out a bit. My family (my children especially, because they are so young) are too precious to put up with that. 

    On the other hand I agree with you about standing firm and not being intimidated or run-down by the trolls. We need to let the light shine and I so enjoy reading your blog and others like it so,  thank-you!

    My prayer has always been that the Lord would use me and our family as a source of encouragement to others and He has! Blogging was a good outlet for me but for the season we are in now I felt led to stop…maybe one day I’ll return…

    • Guest

      Why is everyone so quick to tell the Jeubs what the advertisements are??
      I just think its funny that people like Christine are always pointing that out!! I think we can handle a psychic add and not be tempted into believing that psychic crap!
      You should just click on it Christine and it will charge the psychic 5 cents and give the Jeubs 5 cents too! But yes, you are holier than all pointing out the psychic!

       

      • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

        There you go! They pay a dime and I get a nickel. Heh heh.

    • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

      If you’re an aspiring author, consider blogging. I think of it as the modern-day journaling. It keeps you at your best. From the looks of things, your writing is good, and others may appreciate your work.

  • Ann Washburn

    There is a saying, I don’t know who to attribute it to, but:  You can’t please everyone all the time, but you can try to please some of the people some of the time!  :-)  If even Our Lord can’t please everyone all the time, should this really be something we are striving to accomplish?  This is human pride talking, seeking to please everyone all the time, and truly, isn’t it more important to please the Lord?  :-)

    • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

      You are so very correct!

  • Tammie E.

    I blog. Just dont feel many read. I dont often feel that what I have to say is worthy of being read. I guess I blog more to get the thought out. Something new to me. Maybe that is the case ? It is a struggle for me anyway.

    • Tammie

      I should add though, critics dont bother me, I commonly just share very raw candid stuff… But my though is ‘Why would someone else want to read my rubbish let alone get anything from it other than depression’. I guess I have esteem issues or something, but I just havent been able to see the point, so why would someone else ?

      • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

        Consider articulating a core value (i.e. thesis statement, an elevator pitch, a central theme). No one’s immune to depression, at least I find myself there sometimes. But it knocks me back to my standard value. For me it’s Family, Children, Love and Jesus.

      • Jennifer Mull

        Tammie, sometimes by sharing those raw, candid feelings, you help another person realize they are not alone, and they have the opportunity to come out of themselves a little to have compassion for another…… you can bring a person some healing by helping them see that you are working through it… a person who is a little behind you on that road needs to know that it CAN be worked through… by sharing, they not only feel some of that depression, but they begin to feel a little hope, as well….

  • Charlene

    “So the trolls come, they vomit in the comment section of our blog posts,. . . ”

    I haven’t seen that. I haven’t seen anyone “ticked off” either. I do see people disagreeing with your opinions, but that is going to happen with opinions. Not everyone is going to agree with you.  I haven’t seen many who are “vomiting” on your site (and it doesn’t sound very Christlike to use a term like that).

    People are going to disagree with you. I don’t see the need to keep dwelling on it.

    • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

      Perhaps you’re right, “vomit” was a little strong.

  • dragonfrye16

    Good post. I am the mom of 15 children (a mix of bio and adopted).  I enjoy my own blog a lot. Is that weird to say? I am my own biggest and most likley the only reader!  I usually do not share deep spiritual things or even many practical large family/homeschooling logistical  type stuff on it. My blog tends to be more random and kind of silly.The everyday fun side of our large family. I have to say that I do at times feel outside pressure that I should be posting less fluff or more meaty meaningful posts. But I do not think it is a Holy Spirit nudging, it’s more of an ‘if I really loved the Lord I would write those kind blog posts’ kind of guilt. Who knows ,though , the Lord just might want me to someday. I do have lots to say. I tend to by habit be a glass half empty/the sky is falling kind of gal and my blog makes me smile. After a real hard day I look at my blog and think see the whole day was not a total wash.

    • Jennifer Mull

      Sometimes it is hard for me to write on my blog because I feel like I should have this great, meaningful post every single time I write…. it intimidates me and then I end up neglecting my blog…. I wish I could just relax and take a more simple approach. I think there are different kinds of blogs, and I hope you will always write what you feel the Holy Spirit nudges you toward, and not anyone else’s influence. :-)

      • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

        Ken Davis’ SCORRE method helps a lot. Stay focused on one central theme in every post. That’s one of the best pieces of advice I’ve gotten, and it keeps Wendy and me focused.

    • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

      What’s your link? Post it here. I’m curious!

  • http://www.adventurezinchildrearing.com Kelli- AdventurezNchildRearing

    amen to that! 

  • Susan

    too many kids, especially since it is apparent your family does not have the organizational skills to run the household properly. I watched your tv special and noticed that some of the beds had no sheets on them, there were holes in the walls, torn wallpaper, and the toilet in the boys’ bathroom was filthy, dark brown on the inside of the entire bowl! Why would you even let people film that before cleaning it?? It’s disgusting. The boys are messy and dirty. You seriously need another adult to help you with some housework.

    • http://www.jeubfamily.com Chris Jeub

      Sounds like you got us all figured out. After watching 46 minutes of our lives in 2006, you feel obliged to post this judgment on our website? And it’s because we have “too many kids,” in your opinion?

      Stick around and read our blog a bit more than this. You’ll discover a family who aspires to love and joy, no exceptions. A house of love is what we hope for all families, including yours.

      Quick rebuttal: (1) our children sleep with sheets, not sure where you got the contrary idea, (2) our dining room was being remodeled at the time — the torn wallpaper and holes have all been replaced, and (3) we have a new toilet. Not sure why you think the boys are “messy and dirty.” Gee, I feel the love.